All of the Above
Authenticity seems to be a hot topic lately. Books and journal articles about being an authentic leader cite how constituencies have grown to value greater degrees of transparency in their leaders.
The subtle inference is that whatever the potentate is thinking or feeling, it is both universal and discrete. And that in revealing their true feelings, we will be able to know what kind of person they truly are. Perhaps strong or stoic? Maybe harmony-driven or expressive? Could be self-centered or generous?
It would be convenient if people could actually be captured so succinctly.
At lunch recently with some friends, looking at us you might’ve assumed we were all “the same”. By some yardsticks, we are. Two of us grew up in the same town. Two drive the same model vehicle. Three work out at the same gym. Three have kids. Three (not the same three) have husbands.
We are also individually unique. One lived in Mexico as a child. One works part-time. One teaches at her gym. One weaves delicate baskets. One is member of a country club. One is a recovering alcoholic. One faced a serious cancer scare. One is a writer.
Each of these individual life experiences both informs and is informed by our beliefs and values.
No matter how homogeneous we claim or believe ourselves to be, we are all unique. It is, in fact, the one way we are all the same.
Our efforts to be authentic with others can sometimes lead us down a path of self discovery. When we begin to evaluate our true nature-our likes, dislikes, beliefs and deal breakers, we may encounter any number of unexpected awarenesses. Not just in our thoughts but also in our actions.
Perhaps the hat we always claimed was ours no longer fits. We realize we are no longer this, but that now instead. We have out grown our old version of ourselves. Some experience unraveled all that we were sure and certain of.
Or maybe out of the choices, we realize we are not this or that. Instead, we are a bit of each. We are and not or. We may even be…all of the above.