Respond or React?
On the eve of a holiday that brings people together in various delicious and obligatory situations, I’ve been thinking about the difference between responding and reacting.
Regardless of the degree to which our present company is beloved, the holidays can be a bit of an emotional mine field. Our expectations are proportional to the size of the turkey or number of chairs around the table.
Out of our routine and off of our schedules, we can revert to toddlerhood quickly. We’re not sure what we need, but we know it doesn’t involve eating another random cranberry salad or playing a 4-hour game of Monopoly with a banker that should be under federal investigation.
In these situations, as with any in which the room is charged with emotion, we can choose to respond or react.
To respond means to reply–from the Latin re-spondere to re pledge or re promise. Interestingly, the word sponsor also comes from this root.
Conversely, to react is defined as acting again. Reacting by repeating my behavior or another’s, simply doesn’t carry the same commitment to the relationship that re-pledging does.
These principles are just as relevant in a conference room as they are in a dining room. Each time I engage with others, I am making a choice. What will my behavior demonstrate about my commitment to our common goals and values? What do I sponsor?
So tomorrow, if people start to get on my nerves, I will be mindful the promise I made as a guest at their table. I will re-pledge to be grateful for the seat…and graciously pass the cranberry compote.
