It Takes a Village
Tell me whom you frequent, and I will tell you who you are. ~ French Proverb
They say it takes a village to raise a child. What I’ve found is that it takes a village to do just about anything.
Growing up, I didn’t know getting through life took a village. I thought everyone I came into contact with was competent, knowledgeable, and self-reliant…that somehow my needing help was a personal deficit. The insecurity I felt was my proof of this. Most unfortunate was that I believed that this deficit must be hidden at all costs.
What I have come to learn is that self-sufficiency is a lie. Not just that it’s impossible, but that it’s actually a lie. We are reliant on others in hundreds of ways every day. There is nothing in this world that is accomplished alone. Not at work. Not at home. Not in love. As with most erroneous beliefs, I rode that horse as far as it would take me before I finally surrendered to a new truth.
At the end of last year, I was struggling. Having successfully completed a big project in the fall, I was feeling at loose ends and ready for the next challenge. Since I had some valuable experience, I thought moving on to the next thing would be easy. Just lay out the work I had done like a check list, and it would be evident to all that I had what it takes to move to the next level. That wasn’t the case. My interviews didn’t go well. I had a couple of unsuccessful tries before I pulling back and taking stock.
The feedback was consistent. We know she can do the job but we’re having a hard time knowing who she is as a person. My ego bruised, I was willing to try something different.
I sought help from a couple of mentors. People who had walked similar roads. They explained that people don’t only want the results that you create at work, they want to feel connected to a team. There is joy found in working together to get something done. Simple things that made a difference.
At the same time, I had been feeling alone personally. I reached out to an old friend for help. It seems that themes play out everywhere when there is a lesson to be learned. I needed to connect more with others…in every area of my life.
When I get messages from multiple sources on the same topic, I realize that the universe is supplying my village and I need to pay attention.
Today I am quicker to notice the patterns. More open. Whether the message comes from a friend or a coworker, a podcast, or a tea tag; I pay attention. Because I know I am not done. And it takes a village to get anything done.
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