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Fast. Slow. Colorful.
Time is an abstraction of eternity. A glimpse, for mortals, of what could be if we spend ours wisely in life. — Dean Cavanaugh The more desperately we want something to occur, the longer it seems to take. Time expands with our desire. We count the minutes waiting for the phone to ring, the storm to pass, or the plane to land. As though by clock watching, we can accelerate ourselves through uncomfortableness. Ironically, we often experience the opposite sensation. The more we focus on that we wish to avoid, the more present we are to it. Like the proverbial rough tooth that draws the tongue, the obsessive thought grows and eclipses the…
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Dogs and Humans
My husband, W, had a heart attack on New Year’s Eve. Thankfully, he’s recovering well after the miraculous procedure of inserting multiple stents into two arteries. We say he’s bionic now. What’s been interesting is how our dog, Roux, has responded to his convalescence. Roux prefers to lay next to W on the couch with his head resting on W’s leg. Or on the floor at W’s feet. We have taken to calling him a therapy dog. I know Roux is not unique in this nurturing trait. Reports abound of canines demonstrating unconditional love and companionship. There are movies showcasing heroic dogs in service to the military and law enforcement agencies. Or dogs who drag people…
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Rule of Three
It’s been said that if you feel surrounded by three or more blockheads, the blockhead is you. (During the holidays, you might convince me to go to four; but under normal circumstances, three is the rule.) In this way, our perspective of others’ behavior is actually a helpful barometer of our own. Some people seem to stay wonderfully on the beam all the time. They don’t get rattled. They don’t “take it personally”. They are unflappable. They seem to have discovered ways to remain tolerant and kind effortlessly. I don’t think it’s effortless. Disclaimer: I’m no expert in this space…but I have learned a few things. I like you best when I’m okay with me. When…
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Once Upon A Time
Everybody loves a narrative. We talk in terms of our life stories. Really, it’s a bunch of little stories all woven together. Some are long; they can span decades. Others last only moments. But every human interaction contains a narrative. It is what we seek and what mean when we say we’ve made a connection. We are so attuned to narratives that we search for them everywhere–saying “that cloud looks like an old woman with an umbrella” or “when she talks to me like that, I feel like a little child.” Everything is relative to the stories we tell ourselves and others. This picture we paint is also the basis of affinity groups. It is their common narrative that brings groups of people…
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Honest Maps
The last week of the year is like the free space on the bingo card of life. Often, we are out of our usual routine. Businesses keep special hours. Folks are traveling or shopping After-Christmas sales. Some use the beginning of the week to recover from a sugar cookie hangover only to exchange cookies for cocktails on New Years Eve. This change in our routine lends itself to some reflection on what we believe–a precursor to resolution setting. What we believe is important, because it is the basis of our actions. What we believe about ourselves is even more important. It informs every interaction we have. When what we believe about ourselves is not current, it’s like we are…
